Refusal to assimilate.

[Static]

It may be the human condition for someone around my age, or not, as my brother and some friends seem to be doing just fine. With me I find society to be just a terrible thing and feel like an outsider looking in.

It's not anything thing emo, goth, or punk bullshit like that but it seems to me that I lack a certain quality that will allow me to blend in or accept the way most people think and go about their lives.

Now me personally I live a dull and dreary life filled with stress and anxiety. Mainly thinking about the future and what it might hold. They say when you worry to much about the future or past you miss the present. Very well, a true quote and one that fits me perfectly.

Looking around and reading news it just irks me to see how life continues on to float in the river of minutia and things that seem important to people but surmount to absolutely nothing in terms of actual importance.

As an example a girl at work was so happy that her business cards were coming in that it seemed she completely forgot how much she hates her job. I know this because she has told me several times with ample reasoning.

It befuddles me to see people do things they know they don't want to and act happy when truly they are sad. Confusing as ever to be a person living in society.

 

[guysensei]

You sort of have to start with the fundamentals and find out what makes you happy, then work from there.

 

[Static]

all emotions are fleeting. Someone can find a state of happy but it will ultimately be gone within hours if not minutes. Anger, frustration, depression all of which have timed expirations once the onset begins.

No, to truly become part of society will require a fundamental acceptance and change in one's personality. Or a quality that was always there.