Awesome quotes from my boss in Afghanistan

[coRtALoS]

This guy is a pissed off Greek, who hates it here. However he makes my life a fucking joy when I sit in his office, working on a project, while he yells at some of the locals.

I wish I started taking notes of some of the shit that comes out of his mouth sooner, but here's his quote of the day for today.

(He's saying all of this to a local Afghani btw)

Do you know what a monkey is? Those little furry animals?
Do you know what a football is? You kick it around and stuff.
And do you know what fucking is? Sex? Yes? OK.

This provisioning problem we're having is like a bunch of monkeys trying to fuck a football. Same thing here. Bunch of monkeys, they constantly fuck this process, every day, and at the end they take a dump on it too. So you fix it by changing the rules. You take all these monkeys over here, and split them up, so they're not all trying to fuck the same ball.

This guy is going to be sorely missed among the expats here.

 

[Amantis]

LOL. Just hope that the boss doesn't get crazy grudges from the locals. They could be rather vicious.

- Amantis

 

[concrete_sox]

lol that was awesome

 

[Renzokuken]

Is he black? I hope so.

 

[ZyrteK]

Just dont get erection

 

[CerebralChain]

Just dont get erection

You too, huh?

 

[Aurora]

xD - I want moar. So funny.

 

[MGCImtR]

This guy is a pissed off Greek, who hates it here. However he makes my life a fucking joy when I sit in his office, working on a project, while he yells at some of the locals.

I wish I started taking notes of some of the shit that comes out of his mouth sooner, but here's his quote of the day for today.

(He's saying all of this to a local Afghani btw)

This guy is going to be sorely missed among the expats here.

Record him rather than make attempts to quote him.

 

[coRtALoS]

His insults and jokes are so spur of the moment, I'd never be able to time it right.

 

[coRtALoS]

Got another one today!!

So I'm talking to [the security administrator] today about this new bangladeshi we hired. I guess he comes in wearing all his traditional muslim shit. You know, those stupid little hats, the traditional robes and hasn't shaved in months.

[The security guy]'s like, "You gotta talk to this guy about it, or he's not going to be allowed onto the premises."

So I went up to him and said, "Lose the towel, shave your beard and change your fucking clothes."

 

[Amantis]

His insults are pretty good, but in a Muslim dominated country, that's really pushing it.

- Amantis

 

[Renzokuken]

His insults are pretty good, but in a Muslim dominated country, that's really pushing it.

- Amantis

What Manty should have said, is this;

"His insults are pretty good, but in a Muslim dominated country, that's really fucking hilarious."

 

[coRtALoS]

What Manty should have said, is this;

"His insults are pretty good, but in a Muslim dominated country, that's really fucking hilarious."

^^

This is a company owned by two Afghani-Americans. Both of which are basically born-again westerners. When my boss swears, he doesn't usually do it in an overly condescending tone. He'll usually be chuckling while he says "shave your fucking beard".

 

[Aurora]

But isn't he making fun of his own "people" then? Sounds like there is a lack of common sense in the head of that guy. He still stay funny, though.

 

[coRtALoS]

My boss, and the company owners aren't the same people. Ultimately I report to the owners, but they don't handle my day-to-day operations, nor do I interact any more often than I absolutely need to.

 

[Galatia]

Greeks are not very fond of muslims since 1453

 

[coRtALoS]

Goooood year.

How far is Sparta from your place by the way? I know it's a long drive, just curious how long.

 

[Galatia]

The distance between Athens and Sparta is about 140 miles - 2,5 hours by car.

 

[Wing Zero]

The distance between Athens and Sparta is about 140 miles - 2,5 hours by car.

ready up your kitchen and condoms :trippy:

 

[Amantis]

What Manty should have said, is this;

"His insults are pretty good, but in a Muslim dominated country, that's really fucking hilarious."

>:O

Gally already has our orders to bully Cort.

- Amantis