Emo Poems

Discussion in 'Artistic Expressions' started by IceDevil9, Jul 8, 2005.

  1. CelestialBadger

    CelestialBadger Retired Staff

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    You threw off the meter in the last line too! Completely caught me off guard! Whew...I'm going to need a minute to get my nerves back together.
    7/10

    A poem about writing poems...Hmmm...Kind of abstract, but I'd say a little bit cliche as well. Unneeded, I think, is the bit about "Hot Topic". It only confuses your meter and it seems unnecessary to say where you bought the book from. Unless you were looking for "street creds" or the like by saying that you shop at Hot Topic. But still, I think overall it turned out okay. The first line really captures your yearning for the poem book quite well. Perhaps it's a metaphor for love?
     
  2. Pains Requiem

    Pains Requiem BattleForums Senior Member

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    The cliche is what I was pointing out.
     
  3. BleedingSorrow

    BleedingSorrow New Member

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    Aching pain, I’m lying here
    Drenched in sorrow
    Bathed in fear.
    Who could find me,
    Alone, in peace.
    If they did my pain could cease.
    Burning! Oh the sadness wells
    For your heart I’d brave
    The depths of hell.
    The stars rise up
    Clouds fall below.
    I ****in’ love you, stupid ho!!
     
  4. concrete_sox

    concrete_sox Premium Respected Member

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    listen ur new so im gonna give u this gentally
    THE THREAD IS ****ING 3 YEARS OLD U DONT BUMP IT DUDE
     
  5. DoomedSoul

    DoomedSoul Ur local Wc3 Emo

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    i have lots of emo poems...
    Booksie
     
  6. concrete_sox

    concrete_sox Premium Respected Member

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    hahah ur only 13
     
  7. DoomedSoul

    DoomedSoul Ur local Wc3 Emo

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    u didnt know that... iam a mature 13 thank u
     
  8. concrete_sox

    concrete_sox Premium Respected Member

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    LOL u lie
     
  9. DoomedSoul

    DoomedSoul Ur local Wc3 Emo

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    no me lie bout lots of things but not that lol
     
  10. concrete_sox

    concrete_sox Premium Respected Member

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    im a metalhead and ur an emo i dont think we should be having this convosation
     
  11. DoomedSoul

    DoomedSoul Ur local Wc3 Emo

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    hey me a hard rocker tooo :(