My Autography

[Kuzmich]

Well i saw JD do it so i started writing one muself, just to see who the hell on this forum would care.

here we go i didn't finish it yet, i will add more tomorrow:

I wish I could say that I understand life, but the thing is I don’t. I am 16, I have been through much, but is it more then others? I am not the judge of that. So, lets begin the story of my life. My first memory is snow falling on the ground, and I am looking outside a window of a 1-room apartment, a red car parks near the entrance into the apartment building. My father comes out. Although during that time my family had problems with money to an extent that we didn’t have enough to buy food, I consider this time as the most uneventful and best time of my life. I was ignorant of real life back then; my parents protected me I was about the age of 6. By then I hit ten I already seen a lot. I saw how skinheads killed the Ukrainian girl and her family outside of our school. That was the first meeting with real life I ever had. I was shocked, in my 9 years of age I didn’t yet fully realize how cruel is this life. After that incident I think I changed, I can not be sure for change in yourself is hard to notice. I started getting into fights, many times once I couldn’t win. Every time I ended up on a floor with blood on my face and weeping I was absorbing the anger for the next fight. After that year 1998 rolled around, it was a big change for my family. We moved to Moscow, my father started making money, life started looking better. But it only looked this way from the outside, inside it remained the same. Here I met people who remain my friends even today, we changed schools, I moved to US and came back but we always kept in touch. Particularly with my best friend Dima. He was a smart fellow and we gained each others respect quickly. At the age of 11 I started drinking, I started small but then after a while it grew into a problem. During 3 years I spent in Moscow before moving to US I tried to ignore that problem, to just view it as nothing, a temporary obsession, not even an obsession but just something I like to do. I wasn’t getting drunk alone I always had my friends present so it didn’t even cross my mind to consider this alcoholism. I was the same Ivan I was in St. Petersburg so I got into pointless fights very often, but now I was bigger and stronger and I had my friends ready to stick up for me, so I wasn’t the one weeping as often as before. I liked fighting, pounding someone into the ground, proving my superiority with the simplest way possible. Call me sadistic but I liked it, it took my mind off things. It was around that time then I started liking girls. I wasn’t dating anyone for real until I was 12, it was then that I met Dasha. I still don’t know what love is, but she taught what affection is. We were hanging out, being best friends, playing around a little bit, but the first time I had sex with her was then I was 13. And by then it was already 2001 and I my family moved to US. It was a shock, I actually started forming a normal life, disregarding my tendency to get into fights and my drinking problem. I yelled at my parents with every word I had at my disposal yet I still could not express the deepness of my feelings. Then I split up with my friends. It was second time I was living my life behind me and starting a new one, and I was only 13. In US my drinking problem grew to whole new heights. I barely knew the language, and I everything around me was knew and unknown. I didn’t want to know what is around me, I locked myself up and started drinking, it was harder to get alcohol but I managed, because I met a guy who seemed to understand me, as ridiculous as it seemed to me at the time. His name was Omar, he was black, and he was my only friend at the time.

[Sicloan]

i think you mean autobiography.

[Magikarp]

Not too bad, Kuzmich. I don't think it was as good nor as sincere as Jd's, but considering that you live in Russia and haven't had four years of high school English, it's a decent autobiography. I liked the way you came clean with your alcohol problems; I didn't realize that you actually had issues with drinking.

I look forward to the rest of your biography. I would also like to see you elaborate more on your expierences in the U.S., since that seems one of the key events in your life.

Keep up the good work . I recently posted a thread in the Forum Suggestion Box saying that we should have an Autobiography Contest; hopefully, if it goes through, your writing can be included in the contest.

[Kuzmich]

Thx, i'll be working on it once i get more time. Also i am trying to keep it as sincere as i can, but i do have to leave a lot of events out.

[Kuzmich]

(this is the second part of my autography)

My drinking problem was growing bigger every day, I eventually stopped hanging out with people at all. I was just sitting locked up in my room all day and drinking beer. I did terrible in school although everything I learned wasn’t new to me because I already learned all of it back in Russia. Finally about 6-7 months into being an alcoholic it hit me that what I am doing is not right. I got disgusted with myself that was not a way for a man to behave in my situation. All that time my parents were too busy to care, they were all wrapped up in getting insurance, paying the bills, working most of the day. We were in a foreign country and things were a bit different from what we used to have back in Russia. So I talked to my father about my problem, instead of what I thought he would do, which was to ground me and limit my access to any kind of alcohol, he actually tried to help me. We went to a rehab, what can I say? It all seemed pointless, I didn’t see how it could help me, but it eventually did. I started getting interested in other things, became much more social, started going to parties and ****. Omar was still my friend, so we hang out, that helped too a bit. I started doing much better in school, life was good again, well good to an extent I wanted it to be. I was still determined to move to Russia by the age of 18, at any cost, that influenced how my relationships with people in US. In those two years I didn’t have one constant girlfriend, and I can’t even remember the faces of most girls I met at the parties. That’s how I lived through two years, I still drank alcohol but I knew my limit, well at least I wasn’t drinking alone in my room anymore. After that year 2002 came and my father’s plans in US crushed, the company he started and that made him good amount of money suddenly ran out of business. He still had a lot of connections back in Russia, St.Petersburg where he and his navy friends started a company called “Parnas” back in early 90s. That company was very prosperous at that time, and its CEO was my father’s friend. So my father decided to go back. You can’t imagine how happy I was. I almost immediately forgot about those people in US who I considered friends. We went back, but we didn’t go back to St.Petersburg, we went back to Moscow. “Parnas” was expanding into the city and my father was hired as a president of that extension. During two years in US I still kept contact with my friends so all I had to do was call them up. A lot has changed during me being in US, but I still can’t imagine having a greater feeling of belonging then in Moscow. Time went by quickly and here I am in my last year of school, with only a year away from being drafted. I feel good about my life and myself, I have a job, I just broke up with my g/f a couple of weeks ago but I am over her, and still single. School is harder then anything I could have expected but I am doing the best I can. Nothing more to say really, my life isn’t a routine, a lot of things are happening but they are too many and not that significant to put in this autobiography.

[Sakuhta]

Do you mean autobiography?...

[Kuzmich]

Yes as someone else already pointed out before you. I felt like **** then i posted this so i hit the bottle. It was kinda hard to think on my grammatics.

[Sakuhta]

Ok well not that big of deal... you could have corrected it when the person before pointed it out then.

[Kuzmich]

I can't correct the tittle of the thread.