Register for free, and make this box disappear!

Welcome to the BF Forums! Register Now, It's Free!


Welcome to the BF Forums; your source for the latest and greatest video game news, strategies, discussions, and resources. Join over 60,000 like-minded gamers from around the world to chat about your interests in our community.

You are currently viewing the forums as a guest user, which limits your access to certain content, contests, downloads, and more. By joining our free community, you will be able to respond in discussions/articles, contact members privately (PM), participate in regular-scheduled contests, see less advertisements, and have access to many other features. Registration is quick, easy, and completely free.



Have your questions answered. Share your thoughts about a topic. Take 2 minutes, Register Now!
BattleForums.com Forums > Other Interests > The Artist Outlet > Literature Haven

We're Half-Way There!! - BF Lotto: $50 Ebay or Amazon Gift Card - A Single Click is All It Takes...

Literature Haven A place to show off your imagination and creativity skills. Here you can find the Roleplayer's Realm, our newest addition, Dungeons & Dragons, as well as our Writer's Council Forum.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-19-2004, 08:57 PM   #1 (permalink)
BattleForums Junior Member
 
SilverSteel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Age: 20
Posts: 93
The love between Angel and Devil

(Note: All the characters, setting, weapon, and ranks in this stoy are all copyright by the Steel Production, any violation to the story is conceder a crime.)

(Additional Note: It is for private and personal use only--it cannot
be reprinted in part or in whole, or reproduced in any way or in
any form (written or otherwise). it is a free document that cannot
be used in any sort of transaction.)

As I approach to the Gate of Hell, somthing is holding back me, a memory, a girl or shall I say Angel. As I'm hestiate for a moment she fly down infront of me, big beautieye, long silky hair, the devil like body and the Angel face, all the feature that I adore.

She: Stop Alex, what do think you are doing?
Me: What you think I'm doing?
She: You know how dangerous it is to open the Gate of Hell in the mortal realm
Me: I know the laws of nature, Tracy
She: I don't think you know it all, or you just forgot what it mean to be a Angel
Me: (rise voice) I'm not an Angel!!!
She: Then whats the Wing behind your back?
Me: It will dispear soon, now out of my way
She: I'm not letting you do this Alex, there is no way you are getting in
Me: You think I can't take you?

she hestiate for a moment, then a voce shout "Can't take all of us". by that theres about two dozen Angels flew down, all wearing the Silver Amor, same as mines.

Lucas the one just spoke, step up and say: Alexander, as the keeper of the law, it is my duty to keep peace on earth so that no magic is to be broken , and you (pointing at me) had strongly broken the rule by summon the Gate of Hell in the Mortal realm, I suggest you give up and wait for you punishment.
Me: Lucas, Lucas, didn't you get tired with all your crap about laws, we known each other for over a hundred year now, and not one day you talk anything else but the law, I have had enought!.

I draw out my dark soul sword, a old old friend of mines, haven't been unsheath for hundred of years, today is the day that I'll show the world the glory of my sword, they think two dozen angels could stop me, well think again in three minutes all of them is down, my white feather amor now is cover by the blood of the Angels.
I speard only two angel, Tracy and Lucas, Lucas.... lets just say I hope that he could grow anther wing in five years, Tracy, she didn't had a scartch on her, I don't want ruin her perfect featuer in my heart.
Again I approach the Gate, this time no one stoping me, Tracy... she just stand there looking at me, watching me disapear in the Gate.

Darkness is all around me, I could see nothing but the deep darkness yet somehow I felt like home, there is a opening infront of me, Hell is not that much different from Heaven, just is darker, reder, and hoter. there is a bridge infront of me, round it by fire, there is a tablet gives the name of this place "Bridge between Mortal Realm and the Dark Realm", so this is the Bridge between Mortal Realm and the Dark Realm, well better get this over with, I start to walk through the bridge, is easier than I though. Soon I got in a great hall. In the end of the Hall there is a chair, had snakes craved on it and had a dragon head on top the chair, I, now standing the middle of the hall, suddendy the the hall is lighten up, there is solders (monster solders) coming all around us, then a big guy, with horns (well all of them had horns, is just his is ...bigger) walk up and sat on the chair, I guess he is I'moen Blood Axe, the Lord of Hell.

(To be continue)
SilverSteel is offline   Reply With Quote
Alt Heute
Advertising

Beitrag Sponsored Links

__________________
Ads suck! Take 2 minutes to register for your free account, and GET RID OF THESE ADS!
   
Old 01-20-2004, 06:34 PM   #2 (permalink)
King Endymion
 
bamthedoc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: North Carolina, USA
Age: 25
Posts: 4,288
This is a bit on the "hard to read" side. You need to go back, look at your grammar, and repair the damage bad grammar has done to your work. It looks good, but I got lost in the jungle there.

Also, if you don't mind, I'm going to borrow your Notes for a new thread I thought of thanks to you
__________________
I am a force of good that none can oppose. BAM the DOC

a.k.a.
DragonAgnstEvil


Role-Player's Realm ~ Literature Haven


*mumbles something about "puppy dog eyes" and "crying women"*
Currently = Wii pwns my soul ;_;
Wii + Bonnie Lasses = Ultimate Combination!
bamthedoc is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2004, 01:02 AM   #3 (permalink)
BattleForums Senior Member
 
Hot Action Akule's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Honolulu, Hawaii
Age: 20
Posts: 3,259
Re: The love between Angel and Devil

Quote:
Originally posted by SilverSteel
(Note: All the characters, setting, weapon, and ranks in this stoy are all copyright by the Steel Production, any violation to the story is conceder a crime.)
(To be continue)
I'll conceder that next time i want a story written by an 8 year old....

1/10... bad structure, grammer, its just not appeasing.
__________________
Time for a Change.
Think Big, Expect Big

AIM: AsyranChimp
Email: Jahkule@gmail.com
DA: http://akule.deviantart.com/
Hot Action Akule is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2004, 07:05 PM   #4 (permalink)
BattleForums Addict
 
Deranged Hydralisk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: A cardboard box
Posts: 936
I'm sure it's a good story, but I stopped reading after you misspelled "consider."
__________________
[IMG]
Deranged Hydralisk is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2004, 08:22 PM   #5 (permalink)
BattleForums Junior Member
 
Carpenter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Texas
Posts: 46
Heh hes pretty good for an 8-year old....And dont taunt him. As far as i know you cant write for...beans
__________________
Carpenter is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2004, 03:56 AM   #6 (permalink)
BattleForums Member
 
JeFfDiddy78's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: The BurBS
Posts: 280
i liked it except for the grammer i can't wait to see what happens next
__________________
JeFfDiddy78 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2004, 06:36 AM   #7 (permalink)
dP
BattleForums Senior Member
 
dP's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: dP's Warehouse
Age: 17
Posts: 2,668
lol angel and devil love lol thats just ****ed up i mean what would the kids look like
dP is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2004, 04:45 PM   #8 (permalink)
BattleForums Junior Member
 
battle plans's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: canada rocks
Posts: 217
great story, i agree with most need to work on grammer. and when they fight i think u should talk about the fight more like descripte it that would be kool
__________________
battle plans is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2004, 01:31 AM   #9 (permalink)
Sly
BattleForums Senior Member
 
Sly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: In Spain, under Ace's bed.
Age: 2
Posts: 3,210
learn how to spell and then i mite read the rest
__________________
So she told me to come over and I took that trip
and then she pulled out my mushroom tip
and when it came out it went drip, drip, drip
I didn't know she had the G.I. Joe kung foo grip
Sly is offline   Reply With Quote
 
Reply

« Poetry for her | Touch »

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:17 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.2 | Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.1.0